Healing Holds: Cuddle Positions for Inner Healing by Modern Archetype
- Dream Weaver
- Aug 24
- 4 min read
Updated: Sep 18
Cuddling can be cozy, connective, and profoundly healing. It's a source of nervous system regulation, emotional nourishment, and soul-level restoration. If I'm being honest, I think it's actually kind of magical.
My practice is informed by my training as a social worker and my professional background working with trauma survivors. It's also deeply shaped by my spiritual beliefs, imagination, and playful approach to life. Cuddling can be thought of in terms of physical sensations and various positions. It can also be thought of in terms of inner healing, archetype connection, or parts work.
These archetypes are ones I personally resonate with and have witnessed in clients. They can be used as a guide to explore what you want to experience in your touch or body work.
The Inner Child
The inner child is with us through our lifespan. They are the first part to experience life from your unique perspective. They hold the key to core moments in life- the moments that shape your sense of sense and your place in the world.
Cuddle Position: Cradled Nest
For this cuddle position, the client lies on their side or curled into a fetal position. The Cuddlist creates a nurturing cocoon around the client, gently spooning or holding your back. Optional weighted blankets, stuffies, or pillows to cuddle can support a more immersive experience.
Ideal for: Feeling safe, cared for, nurtured, protected, and held.
Affirmation: "It's okay now. You don't have to be brave here."
The Givers & Workers
Givers and Workers are the ones showing up day after day. Steadily working away, supporting others, and holding up so much responsibility. They risk exhaustion, resentment, and burnout if they don't let go and receive too.
Cuddle Position: Supported Throne
The client leans against the Cuddlist in a seated or semi-reclined position. Held in a throne safe and solid enough for release. The Cuddlist can lead co-breathing or provide a light face, scalp, or shoulder massage to support deeper relaxation and rest.
Ideal for: Relaxation, rest, burnout recovery, rest-resistant people, and stress relief.
Affirmation: "You don't have to hold anything right now. Not even yourself."
The Aging Soul
Aging Souls are people connected to the weight of time. This can come from the natural life progression of aging or a sense of inner wisdom beyond their age. Fatigue, longing, nostalgia, and a sense of having "done this before" are common experiences for Aging Souls.
They hold the capacity for integrating generational wisdom with childlike whimsy and wonder.
Cuddle Position: Side-by-Side Stillness
The Cuddlist and client lie next to each other, face-to-face. They may hold hands, rest foreheads against each other, or gently embrace. This position encourages minimal movement and a deep sense of presence.
Ideal for: Grief, slowing down, connection, presence, and integration.
Affirmation: "There's nothing left to do. Your presence is enough."
The Lonely Heart
The Lonely Hearts are craving connection. They may not be sure how to ask or they may not have someone to ask. Lonely Hearts have love to share, they just haven't found what to pour that love into.
Cuddle Position: Fully Body Embrace
This can be done side-by-side or with one person on top and the other on bottom. The Cuddlist and client gently hug, softly touching and intertwined. Options available in this position include resting a head on the other person's chest or arm, co-breathing, lightly stroking arms or back (always with consent).
Ideal for: Soothing heartache, loneliness, and grief; feeling connected, seen, and cherished.
Affirmation: "You matter. You have value. You are loved."
The Performers, Code Switchers, & Responders
Performers and Responders often have demanding, high pressure and/or intensity work. They may wear a "mask" or code switch, or they have responsibilities demanding they always be "on." Performers, Code Switchers, and Responders carry a uniquely heavy burden that can weigh on the mind, body, heart, and soul. A safe space to drop the role and simply exist can be a peaceful oasis for this archetype.
Cuddle Position: Quiet Shadow
The client lies on their side, with the Cuddlist behind them positioned just below the shoulders. This position allows the Cuddlist to hold up the client without any pressure for the client to be seen. This position promotes a sense of being supported, held up, and empowered. The Cuddlist may (with consent) rest their forehead against the client's back, hold their hand, or hold them in firm embraces to further support a sense of feeling held and valued.
Ideal for: No eye contact, minimal conversation, deep rest, feeling held and cared for.
Affirmation: "You are enough. Your work is enough. You do not need to earn care and rest."
The Mystic, Spiritualist, and Believer
This archetype isn't only seeking physical connection, but spiritual connection as well. They crave meaning, energetic alignment, and even ritual or ceremony. They may follow a specific spiritual path or religious tradition, or practice more organically. Integrating spiritual elements to body-based work can be valuable for everyone, but it is essential for Mystics, Spiritualists, and Believers.
Cuddle Position: Breath & Energy Flow
The Cuddlist and client connect through breathing, light touch, or energy work. Options include co-breathing, guided visualization, intention setting or prayer, cleansings or limpias,
Ideal for: Energy healing, embodiment practices, rituals
Affirmation: "Your spirit is safe to come home."
Final Thoughts
Consider which archetype you're resonating with going into your next cuddle session. These energies are guides for accessing deep connection, pleasure, and release. We will co-create an experience for every part of you to feel safe enough to emerge and ask for what it needs.
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